Post by Mat on Jul 27, 2018 22:24:00 GMT -5
*The following was aired on the official YouTube page of AXW. This is not an official match, in the context of AXW storylines. Jacobs and Hargrave just got sick of waiting to fight, so they took it upon themselves to put together a ring in the parking lot of the corporate office of AXW; put the word out to local fans via twitter and over 150 fans showed up and jam packed the parking lot! The role of referee was the bearded sensation and Chicks & America Co-Captain Ricky Diamond. The role of Ring announcer was being performed by everyone’s favorite nun chuck wielding dude Trent Mathews (who may or may not be responsible for the non-alcoholic soda in the audience), and the time keeping responsibilities is currently being handled by the fast asleep Hoffman LeGrand*
Trent Mathews: What’s up bros!? Everybody here?
Someone from the audience yells “ALAN?” which sparks several moments of “ALANS?” being called out by several fans in the know, which of course turned into “STEVE?” after several seconds.
Trent Mathews: Okay, ain’t no body got time for that! Let’s do this thang! And save me a Dr. Pepper!
Trent begins to introduce in his best 1930’s nasally voice:
Trent Mathews: IN THIS CORNA… weighing in at 214 pounds, fighting out of Detriot Michigan… he is the “Chessmaster…”
Ricky quickly whispers into his ear…
Trent Mathews: Whoops! I mean, CHECKMATE… MICHAEL JAaaaaaaaaCOBS!!!!
The crowd of 150 cheers as Jacobs smiles at the comedy styling of the Chicks and America crew.
Trent Mathews: AND IN THIS CORNA… weighing in at 210 pounds, fighting out of Boston, TAXachusetts, heh… he is the “AMERICAN PSYCHO” and the dude that never smiles…. DALLAS HARrrrrrrrrGRAVE!!!
Referee Ricky Diamond calls both Hargrave and Jacobs to the middle of the ring and explains the rules to booth men, as Trent holds a mic to his lips: “No horseplay, no cussing, no kissing, no reacharounds, no St. Louis Patty Stampers, No Cleveland Steamers, no running on the deck, o going into the pool until half hour after eating, no towel whipping cause those things hurt, no fishing hooking the other guys butt… so help me god if I have to fish your finger out of another guys butt… alright that’s it. Shuffle up and deal fellas!” Ricky sends both men back into their corners:
Ricky Diamond: CONTENDERS READY…. GLADIATORS READY…. FIGHT!!!
The bell rings and Hargrave and Jacobs start to circle each other as the fans have been dying for some AXW action, and this is as close as it gets at the moment! They feel each other out for a moment before tying up in a collar and elbow. Hargrave gives it everything he’s got, but after a moment, Jacobs uses the height and slight weight advantage to back him up into the corner. Ricky D is right there asking for the break, and gets it without incident from Jacobs, to the surprise of Ricky, who golf claps for Jacobs and bows to him. Dallas nods as he steps out of the corner and they circle each other once more. They fly into another tie up, but Jacobs quickly shifts weight and ducks low, taking Hargrave over with a firemen’s carry takeover. Jacobs pops up, but Hargrave sweeps out his legs with a brush of his mighty arm from under him. Both men quickly rise as Dallas catches Jacobs with a running chop block to the mush, taking Jacobs down a little harder this time.
Hargrave pulls Jacobs off the mat, and straightens him up with a rising European Uppercut! The stiff shot stumbles Hargrave back, but he shakes it off and charges, but Dallas whips him over with a headlock takedown! Dallas keeps Jacobs in the hold, locked in tight and the pressure the same. He leans back, bending Jacob’s head at an unnatural angle, but Michael responds by quickly head-scissoring Dallas with his legs. Jacob’s locks his legs, effectively applying a triangle choke. Dallas releases the headlock, brings his legs up, and kicks out of the triangle. Both men scramble to their feet and take aggressive poses, but freeze, seeing the other ready to attack. The crowd begin to cheer the exchange, as does the awake members of Chicks and America.
The two warriors circle each other again, and once again look for a tie up, but Dallas dives forward instead, diving around Jack’s leg and rolling him up into a school boy…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
Jacobs bounces up surprised, and gets caught with a Strong Lariat to the nose by Hargrave! Jacobs crashes to the mat again, dazed, but quickly shakes it off rising again to one knee, but is met with a Busaiku Flying Knee Kick to the face from Hargrave! The snap echo’s around the arena as Jacobs collapses to the mat! Seeing this, Hargrave quickly scampers to the corner and getting ready for Jacobs to rise. As he does, Dallas runs out of the corner full force slamming into Jacobs with his exploder bodycheck! The force sends Jacobs crashing into the ropes and rebounding whiplash like. Dallas quickly slides in for the cover hooking a leg of Jacobs with his arm, and the other leg with his own, almost pulling Jacobs in half…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
KICKOUT!
Dallas slaps the mat three times, glaring at Ricky D, who returns the gesture slapping the mat TWICE and indicating that the shoulder popped up. Dallas shrugs off Ricky D and pulls Jacobs up by the head. Hargrave Irish whips Michael into the corner, but Jacobs reverses sending Dallas in instead. Dallas reaches the corner and manages to grip the top ropes, floating back over top of the charging Jacobs. Michael slams into the corner hard and stumbles back holding his chest. Dallas spins Jacobs and unloads a right forearm, a left forearm, right handed knife edge chop, a left handed knife edge chop, a right handed euro uppercut, a left handed euro uppercut. Dallas then backs off and then charges in hitting a sick looking step up knee to his opponents face! Hargrave hops down, and sprints for the ropes, as Jacobs fell out of the corner to his knees dazed and Dallas returned with a nasty Shinning Wizard!!!
…ONE!
Ricky D stops the count and taps Hargrave and points at the foot over the bottom ropes. Realizing what’s just happened, Hargrave swats the foot away with frustration. Keeping Jacobs close to the ropes, Dallas applies a seated headlock, really sinking in the pressure. Jacobs tries to fight against Dallas’s grip and then finally slips his leg over the bottom rope for a break. Ricky D signals the break again and Dallas gives it again, but slams a SPINE KICK into Jacobs back as a message! The echo cause the crowd to woo for some reason as Jacobs arches his back in pain! Hargrave backs off until Ricky D nods that he can reengage. Dallas charges in as Jacobs jumps to his feet and CLOBBERS Dallas with a solid right hand to the face! Dallas drops like a ton of bricks, and Jacobs goes for the mount, and starts unloading solid right hands to the face of Dallas Hargrave! Ricky tries to get control with a count, but as he reaches 27, he realizes that Jacobs ain’t stopping and physically interjects waving his hands ‘no’ and points to his shirt and the… missing AXW officials badge. Ricky looks around and calls Trent to help him look, meanwhile, Jacobs is pissed off and grabs Hargrave by the head, yanking him to his feet. He front facelocks him and begins to throw repeated Muay Thai kicks to his kisser, until Dallas is on spaghetti legs from the blows! The smacks echo around the arena, and the fans start responding with “OHH’s” every time he lands a shot. He finally grabs Hargrave by the scruff of his neck and tights and whips him chest first into the corner. Hargrave crashes hard and stumbles back a few feet, before Jacobs slams into him with a running forearm shot to the back of the head; locks in a rear waist lock and pivots, nailing his Speaking in Tongues German Suplex into the turnbuckle!!!
The crowd goes crazy as Jacobs pulls a limp Hargrave up again and slams his head into the turnbuckle full force. He spins him around and unleashes one HUGE knife edge chop! The result welts Dallas’s chest almost instantly as Hargrave clutches his sternum. But Michael doesn’t allow a moment’s rest and unloads a stinging European Uppercut to straighten out Hargrave! Dallas slumps back into the corner on dream-street. Jacobs pulls him out of the corner, and nails a Double Arm Suplex! The ring bounces from the impact and Jacobs shoots up to his knees and signals in Ricky D as he covers, pressing his forearm down across the side of Dallas’s face…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THR, NO!
Jacobs pulls Dallas up on wobbly legs and backs him into the ropes. He whips him off and across the ring. Jacobs bounces off the ropes himself for momentum and shoots a running powerful lariat… but Hargrave Ducks! Their momentum bounces each man off the opposite ropes and Dallas leaps, connecting with a Crossbody block… but Jacobs rolls through and displays his power pulling Dallas up off the mat into a lateral press… and SLAMS him down across his knee with a rib breaker… then quickly launches him over head with a release T-Bone Suplex!!!
Jacobs rises to the roaring approval of this crowd, all chanting “JACOBS-JACOBS-JACOBS”, and for a brief moment, Michael snaps out of his intense trace, to acknowledge them with a smile. But he quickly slides in for another cover, again driving Hargrave’s face into the mat with his forearm…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE!!!
NO! Foot on the ropes as indicated by Ricky D! Ricky strokes his beard in disbelief!
Jacobs pulls Dallas up, scoops him off of his feet and slams him hard down to the mat with a body slam. Jacobs backs himself into the corner, raises his right arm with the index finger pointed high and pulls himself up, sitting on the top ropes. He stands to the middle rope and leaps with a kicking knee drop… but hits Canvas as Hargrave rolls out of the way! Jacobs rolls through holding his knee as both men struggle to rise. They both men make their feet at approximately the same time, and Dallas shoots low, connecting with a dropkick to the left knee of Jacobs! Michael hits the mat, hollering in pain, clutching at his knee. Hargrave wisely runs in, grabbing Jack’s leg and looks to apply a knee bar. Jacobs quickly struggles against it and grabs the bottom rope. Ricky D calls for the break, but Dallas continues to hold the pressure. Diamond counts…
Ricky D: Come on Dallas Break it… 1… 2… I swear I’ll rub my beard all over your face dude! It feels like pubes!
Hargrave breaks before three and backs off shooting Diamond a disgusted look. As soon as Ricky D gives Hargrave the sign to reengage, Hargrave slides in and begins repeatedly punching the left knee of Jacobs. Michael hollers and shoves Dallas off repeatedly, but Hargrave keeps coming back in for more. Hargrave grabs the left leg and yanks back on it violently. Dallas slips from the ring, pulling Jacobs legs around either side of the ring post and applies a Ringpost Figure Four! Jacobs hollers in pain as Diamond calls for Dallas to break it. Just before Five Dallas does indeed break the hold, staring at Ricky… then grabs Jacobs legs and yanks his crotch into the post! Dallas quickly slides back into the ring and crosses Jacobs arms around his throat, pulls him back to his feet and executes a wicked Straight Jacket Lung Blower! But doesn’t stop there and scoops Jacobs up onto his shoulder, spiking Jacobs with a Suzuki Styled Tombstone, but stands right back up and makes it a DOUBLE! Making the sign that he’s finished, Dallas lays into Jacobs and hooks both his head and leg in a cradle;
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE-NO!
Jacobs reverses into a crucifix roll up…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE-NO! YES?
Hargrave rolls out of the move but it’s a half second too late as Diamond signals for the THREE! Hargrave, who shot back to his feet instinctively went to clobber Jacobs with a forearm… but held himself back, restraining himself, recognizing it was just that close. Jacobs… who was momentarily taken a back, accepts Hargrave’s hand who pulls him up to his feet. Ricky stands between both men and raises their hands as Trent takes the mic…
Trent Mathews: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner is…. ALL OF US! I GOT DAD’S CREDIT CARD… LET’S ATTEMPT TO GET DRUNK OFF OF PEPSI!! WOOT WOOT!
*The scene plays out as the drunken fans rush the ring and begin partying with the wrestlers and crew as the video cuts out.*
Trent Mathews: What’s up bros!? Everybody here?
Someone from the audience yells “ALAN?” which sparks several moments of “ALANS?” being called out by several fans in the know, which of course turned into “STEVE?” after several seconds.
Trent Mathews: Okay, ain’t no body got time for that! Let’s do this thang! And save me a Dr. Pepper!
Trent begins to introduce in his best 1930’s nasally voice:
Trent Mathews: IN THIS CORNA… weighing in at 214 pounds, fighting out of Detriot Michigan… he is the “Chessmaster…”
Ricky quickly whispers into his ear…
Trent Mathews: Whoops! I mean, CHECKMATE… MICHAEL JAaaaaaaaaCOBS!!!!
The crowd of 150 cheers as Jacobs smiles at the comedy styling of the Chicks and America crew.
Trent Mathews: AND IN THIS CORNA… weighing in at 210 pounds, fighting out of Boston, TAXachusetts, heh… he is the “AMERICAN PSYCHO” and the dude that never smiles…. DALLAS HARrrrrrrrrGRAVE!!!
Referee Ricky Diamond calls both Hargrave and Jacobs to the middle of the ring and explains the rules to booth men, as Trent holds a mic to his lips: “No horseplay, no cussing, no kissing, no reacharounds, no St. Louis Patty Stampers, No Cleveland Steamers, no running on the deck, o going into the pool until half hour after eating, no towel whipping cause those things hurt, no fishing hooking the other guys butt… so help me god if I have to fish your finger out of another guys butt… alright that’s it. Shuffle up and deal fellas!” Ricky sends both men back into their corners:
Ricky Diamond: CONTENDERS READY…. GLADIATORS READY…. FIGHT!!!
The bell rings and Hargrave and Jacobs start to circle each other as the fans have been dying for some AXW action, and this is as close as it gets at the moment! They feel each other out for a moment before tying up in a collar and elbow. Hargrave gives it everything he’s got, but after a moment, Jacobs uses the height and slight weight advantage to back him up into the corner. Ricky D is right there asking for the break, and gets it without incident from Jacobs, to the surprise of Ricky, who golf claps for Jacobs and bows to him. Dallas nods as he steps out of the corner and they circle each other once more. They fly into another tie up, but Jacobs quickly shifts weight and ducks low, taking Hargrave over with a firemen’s carry takeover. Jacobs pops up, but Hargrave sweeps out his legs with a brush of his mighty arm from under him. Both men quickly rise as Dallas catches Jacobs with a running chop block to the mush, taking Jacobs down a little harder this time.
Hargrave pulls Jacobs off the mat, and straightens him up with a rising European Uppercut! The stiff shot stumbles Hargrave back, but he shakes it off and charges, but Dallas whips him over with a headlock takedown! Dallas keeps Jacobs in the hold, locked in tight and the pressure the same. He leans back, bending Jacob’s head at an unnatural angle, but Michael responds by quickly head-scissoring Dallas with his legs. Jacob’s locks his legs, effectively applying a triangle choke. Dallas releases the headlock, brings his legs up, and kicks out of the triangle. Both men scramble to their feet and take aggressive poses, but freeze, seeing the other ready to attack. The crowd begin to cheer the exchange, as does the awake members of Chicks and America.
The two warriors circle each other again, and once again look for a tie up, but Dallas dives forward instead, diving around Jack’s leg and rolling him up into a school boy…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
Jacobs bounces up surprised, and gets caught with a Strong Lariat to the nose by Hargrave! Jacobs crashes to the mat again, dazed, but quickly shakes it off rising again to one knee, but is met with a Busaiku Flying Knee Kick to the face from Hargrave! The snap echo’s around the arena as Jacobs collapses to the mat! Seeing this, Hargrave quickly scampers to the corner and getting ready for Jacobs to rise. As he does, Dallas runs out of the corner full force slamming into Jacobs with his exploder bodycheck! The force sends Jacobs crashing into the ropes and rebounding whiplash like. Dallas quickly slides in for the cover hooking a leg of Jacobs with his arm, and the other leg with his own, almost pulling Jacobs in half…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
KICKOUT!
Dallas slaps the mat three times, glaring at Ricky D, who returns the gesture slapping the mat TWICE and indicating that the shoulder popped up. Dallas shrugs off Ricky D and pulls Jacobs up by the head. Hargrave Irish whips Michael into the corner, but Jacobs reverses sending Dallas in instead. Dallas reaches the corner and manages to grip the top ropes, floating back over top of the charging Jacobs. Michael slams into the corner hard and stumbles back holding his chest. Dallas spins Jacobs and unloads a right forearm, a left forearm, right handed knife edge chop, a left handed knife edge chop, a right handed euro uppercut, a left handed euro uppercut. Dallas then backs off and then charges in hitting a sick looking step up knee to his opponents face! Hargrave hops down, and sprints for the ropes, as Jacobs fell out of the corner to his knees dazed and Dallas returned with a nasty Shinning Wizard!!!
…ONE!
Ricky D stops the count and taps Hargrave and points at the foot over the bottom ropes. Realizing what’s just happened, Hargrave swats the foot away with frustration. Keeping Jacobs close to the ropes, Dallas applies a seated headlock, really sinking in the pressure. Jacobs tries to fight against Dallas’s grip and then finally slips his leg over the bottom rope for a break. Ricky D signals the break again and Dallas gives it again, but slams a SPINE KICK into Jacobs back as a message! The echo cause the crowd to woo for some reason as Jacobs arches his back in pain! Hargrave backs off until Ricky D nods that he can reengage. Dallas charges in as Jacobs jumps to his feet and CLOBBERS Dallas with a solid right hand to the face! Dallas drops like a ton of bricks, and Jacobs goes for the mount, and starts unloading solid right hands to the face of Dallas Hargrave! Ricky tries to get control with a count, but as he reaches 27, he realizes that Jacobs ain’t stopping and physically interjects waving his hands ‘no’ and points to his shirt and the… missing AXW officials badge. Ricky looks around and calls Trent to help him look, meanwhile, Jacobs is pissed off and grabs Hargrave by the head, yanking him to his feet. He front facelocks him and begins to throw repeated Muay Thai kicks to his kisser, until Dallas is on spaghetti legs from the blows! The smacks echo around the arena, and the fans start responding with “OHH’s” every time he lands a shot. He finally grabs Hargrave by the scruff of his neck and tights and whips him chest first into the corner. Hargrave crashes hard and stumbles back a few feet, before Jacobs slams into him with a running forearm shot to the back of the head; locks in a rear waist lock and pivots, nailing his Speaking in Tongues German Suplex into the turnbuckle!!!
The crowd goes crazy as Jacobs pulls a limp Hargrave up again and slams his head into the turnbuckle full force. He spins him around and unleashes one HUGE knife edge chop! The result welts Dallas’s chest almost instantly as Hargrave clutches his sternum. But Michael doesn’t allow a moment’s rest and unloads a stinging European Uppercut to straighten out Hargrave! Dallas slumps back into the corner on dream-street. Jacobs pulls him out of the corner, and nails a Double Arm Suplex! The ring bounces from the impact and Jacobs shoots up to his knees and signals in Ricky D as he covers, pressing his forearm down across the side of Dallas’s face…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THR, NO!
Jacobs pulls Dallas up on wobbly legs and backs him into the ropes. He whips him off and across the ring. Jacobs bounces off the ropes himself for momentum and shoots a running powerful lariat… but Hargrave Ducks! Their momentum bounces each man off the opposite ropes and Dallas leaps, connecting with a Crossbody block… but Jacobs rolls through and displays his power pulling Dallas up off the mat into a lateral press… and SLAMS him down across his knee with a rib breaker… then quickly launches him over head with a release T-Bone Suplex!!!
Jacobs rises to the roaring approval of this crowd, all chanting “JACOBS-JACOBS-JACOBS”, and for a brief moment, Michael snaps out of his intense trace, to acknowledge them with a smile. But he quickly slides in for another cover, again driving Hargrave’s face into the mat with his forearm…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE!!!
NO! Foot on the ropes as indicated by Ricky D! Ricky strokes his beard in disbelief!
Jacobs pulls Dallas up, scoops him off of his feet and slams him hard down to the mat with a body slam. Jacobs backs himself into the corner, raises his right arm with the index finger pointed high and pulls himself up, sitting on the top ropes. He stands to the middle rope and leaps with a kicking knee drop… but hits Canvas as Hargrave rolls out of the way! Jacobs rolls through holding his knee as both men struggle to rise. They both men make their feet at approximately the same time, and Dallas shoots low, connecting with a dropkick to the left knee of Jacobs! Michael hits the mat, hollering in pain, clutching at his knee. Hargrave wisely runs in, grabbing Jack’s leg and looks to apply a knee bar. Jacobs quickly struggles against it and grabs the bottom rope. Ricky D calls for the break, but Dallas continues to hold the pressure. Diamond counts…
Ricky D: Come on Dallas Break it… 1… 2… I swear I’ll rub my beard all over your face dude! It feels like pubes!
Hargrave breaks before three and backs off shooting Diamond a disgusted look. As soon as Ricky D gives Hargrave the sign to reengage, Hargrave slides in and begins repeatedly punching the left knee of Jacobs. Michael hollers and shoves Dallas off repeatedly, but Hargrave keeps coming back in for more. Hargrave grabs the left leg and yanks back on it violently. Dallas slips from the ring, pulling Jacobs legs around either side of the ring post and applies a Ringpost Figure Four! Jacobs hollers in pain as Diamond calls for Dallas to break it. Just before Five Dallas does indeed break the hold, staring at Ricky… then grabs Jacobs legs and yanks his crotch into the post! Dallas quickly slides back into the ring and crosses Jacobs arms around his throat, pulls him back to his feet and executes a wicked Straight Jacket Lung Blower! But doesn’t stop there and scoops Jacobs up onto his shoulder, spiking Jacobs with a Suzuki Styled Tombstone, but stands right back up and makes it a DOUBLE! Making the sign that he’s finished, Dallas lays into Jacobs and hooks both his head and leg in a cradle;
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE-NO!
Jacobs reverses into a crucifix roll up…
…ONE!
…TWO!!
…THREE-NO! YES?
Hargrave rolls out of the move but it’s a half second too late as Diamond signals for the THREE! Hargrave, who shot back to his feet instinctively went to clobber Jacobs with a forearm… but held himself back, restraining himself, recognizing it was just that close. Jacobs… who was momentarily taken a back, accepts Hargrave’s hand who pulls him up to his feet. Ricky stands between both men and raises their hands as Trent takes the mic…
Trent Mathews: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner is…. ALL OF US! I GOT DAD’S CREDIT CARD… LET’S ATTEMPT TO GET DRUNK OFF OF PEPSI!! WOOT WOOT!
*The scene plays out as the drunken fans rush the ring and begin partying with the wrestlers and crew as the video cuts out.*